6 Days Until Launch: Six Writing Struggles That Taught Me Something Bigger

Writing a book will stretch you. Publishing one will rebuild you. These past two years, writing Moons and Shadows, have been the most creatively fulfilling and emotionally demanding experience of my life. Not just because of the words, but because of what they required of me. So today, I’m sharing six writing struggles that taught me something deeper - not just about being an author, but about being myself in the process.

1. Switching from fantasy to first grade isn’t easy.

By day, I teach full-time in online public education. And I’ve taught every grade level except fourth - currently back in first grade. That means my mornings often start at 2 or 3 a.m. with a workout and some writing before I transition into teaching little ones. But let me tell you: going from chapter five (you’ll understand why when you read it) to phonics and sight words is not for the faint of heart. The emotional and tonal shift was jarring at times. What I learned? I’m capable of holding radically different spaces. It just takes intention.

2. I gained 30 pounds writing this book.

That’s not something I say lightly. Between teaching and writing, I found myself sitting for 18–20 hours some days. I stopped moving my body in the way I used to - and I felt it. The weight wasn’t just physical; it was emotional. What I learned? I have to move. For clarity. For creativity. For my sanity. That’s when I started showing up for myself again - inside and out. And I’ve been slowly, honestly working it off since.

3. I disappeared into the writing - and forgot to come up for air.

Every spare moment was dedicated to the book. I loved it, but I also realized I needed presence in my real life too. My husband, Chris, has always been my grounding point. I learned that even a five-minute conversation or shared breakfast was enough to remind me I wasn’t alone in the world I was building.

4. I need a sounding board who won’t panic.

I don’t need someone to steer the story—I need someone who can hold space for it. I’m not writing at the story; I’m listening to it. I learned that I need a safe, emotionally steady person to brainstorm with. Someone who's consistent and doesn’t freak out if they don’t like a plot turn. Someone who trusts the process, even when it’s messy.

5. There’s a BIG difference between readers, beta readers, and alpha readers.

I’ve learned that alpha readers need to be both brutally honest and deeply respectful of the process. This story unfolds day by day. I don’t always know where it’s going. And I need people around me who won’t throw the whole manuscript out the window if it takes a turn they weren’t expecting. If you’re an alpha reader—you’re walking beside me, not ahead of me.

6. Writing Visha made me physically ill.

There’s no delicate way to say this: Visha is darkness incarnate. And every time I had to sit with her, I felt drained—nauseous, even. I almost threw up the last time I wrote one of her scenes. And that taught me something big: I’ve spent years trying to understand and heal my own shadows. I wasn’t sure how deep my own darkness went… until I found her. I’m still learning how to hold that tension. Still learning how to write from a place that doesn’t break me open too far.

Final Thought:

These struggles weren’t just obstacles. They were mirrors. Reminders. They showed me what I value, what I need, and what I’m still healing. Moons and Shadows didn’t just ask me to write it. It asked me to grow through it.

If you’ve ever carried something quietly…something that’s changed you deeply…this book might be for you.